An open letter to everyone like me who has lied to impress others

Dear person who has lied to impress others,

I am writing this not in judgement but to let you know you don’t have to live like this.

Recently, billionaire tech guru Elon Musk was caught stealing a photo and pretending to be dining at an ice-cream parlour.

The photo had been posted in a restaurant’s feed back in 2017 and he was quickly called out.

This made me realise how lying is one of the silent pandemics we don’t talk about enough.

I mean, a whole billionaire lying on the internet to impress strangers, for what?

We lie to our bosses about having done that report or sent that email, we lie to attract partners on dating apps, we even lie to people about how we feel about them.

There is an old saying that goes; we tell ourselves stories in order to live.

I think what’s more accurate is that we tell people lies in order to survive.

Perhaps they are high maintenance and we give them false versions of ourselves to avoid drama and conflict.

Or maybe we have grown up being told so often that we’re not good enough, that we start to believe it.

We convince ourselves that other versions of us are what people really want, we project a lifestyle that isn’t real and pretend to have beliefs that aren’t true to who we are.

As friends, as family members, and even lovers, too often we feel the need to lie about our feelings, experiences, and accomplishments, simply to make ourselves feel bigger than we are.

We do it to compensate for the things we lack and put off as long as possible dealing with that or doing the work to get better.

We feel that if we post that picture about the amazing lunch we’re having or that beautiful plant we grew, others will love and respect us and that will make us feel complete.

But when you get love based on lies it never flourishes. In fact, it has the opposite effect.

It digs a hole inside you because you know what people are appreciating is not the real you and it makes you wonder when you will be enough.

Well, today, I’m asking you to stop all that.

Stop second guessing yourself, share your truths openly and honestly and open the doorway to the kind of trust that builds long-lasting connections.

And hopefully by just being you, you can give others permission to do the same.

Main image courtesy of freepik.